I Shall Not Want (The Battle with Contentment)
There is a great struggle within us all that pulls, pushes, twists and knots our inner being. That struggle is called satisfaction. Some days this monster can be quite tiny and insignificant, while other moments will find it insatiable. From where is this beast formed and how does it grow?
Webster’s dictionary defines satisfaction as the following:
fulfillment of a need or want
the quality or state of being satisfied: Contentment
a source or means of enjoyment: Gratification
The Oxford dictionary explains it as such:
fulfillment of one’s wishes, expectations or needs, or the pleasure derived from this
When you read the definition, it seems a simple, little thing as contentment would have very little bearing in the day to day transactions we encounter, yet it continuously lurks in the shadows, waiting for the opportunity to darken our moods and thoughts. How is it, that an internal desire can have such a profound effect on the focus and happiness of our daily lives? Let’s unpack some ideas and air out, what might be, some dirty laundry.
“Facebook Made Me Do It”
Keeping up with the Jones’ has taken on a whole new meaning since the advent of social media. Mark Zuckerburg released Facebook in February of 2004 with around 650 college aged, young adults signing up a few days after launch. Today there are roughly two billion active users. What is most concerning is data that was released from the CDC showing the suicide rate among 10-24 year olds. While stable from 2000 to 2007; it increased 57% between 2007 and 2017. That is a massive, tragic jump in a 10 year span and I cannot help but wonder if the rise of social media use correlates to a rise in dissatisfaction and depression, resulting in this horrific statistic?
Contentment is hard to find when we are scrolling daily, observing everyone’s filtered, fluffed, and photoshopped lives splashed on the screen.
“Me and the fam with toes in the sand!” #beachlife
“Just totally redid our entire kitchen and bought new living room furniture.” #totalhouserefresh
“Hangin’ out with my besties!” #partypeopleforever
“Check out my shopping haul and new spring wardrobe.” #slayqueen
You watch the videos, see all the pictures and something inside begins to stir. You want to go on vacation, redo your house and buy new furniture, but your budget is busted. Oh, and you thought you were good friends with all the peeps hanging out together, but no one told you about “Friend’s Night Out.” When was the last time you bought a new outfit for yourself?
Discontentment grows within our heart, shifting our mood and stealing our joy. The hunger begins to feel like starvation and if not properly fed, we believe we will wilt away. This usually moves us to buy things or go places in an effort to satisfy the rumble within our soul; which works, until the next social media post crosses our feed.
“Mirror, Mirror on the Wall”
I’m sure you have heard it said, “You are your own, worst enemy.” I feel no truer words have been spoken about mankind. We have an uncanny knack to think the most terrible things about ourselves. Whether it is due to terrible situations we have encountered which distort our self-image or we spend too much time playing the comparison game, discontentment finds a comfy home in the heart of anyone struggling from self disappointment.
Negativity abounds from head to toe and inside out.
“I hate my curly hair.” or “I wish my hair was curly.”
“What is the deal with my nose?” or “What is going on with the spacing of my eyes?”
“I need to lose weight.” or “I look like a twig, I wish I had curves.”
“My knees look fat.” or “I hate my thighs in shorts.”
“I have fat ankles.” or “My toes are so ugly.”
“Ugh, my laugh is annoying.” or “Why do I word vomit when I’m nervous?”
“Why can’t I look more like her?” or “I wish I could play basketball as well as he does.”
“My coworker is so great at this job.” or “I just don’t measure up compared to him.”
The combinations of unfavorable thoughts are endless and when left to develop, birth a new emotion that links arms with discontentment - Insecurity.
We will spend more time on this topic in a later post, but for now understand insecurity is the “little sibling” to dissatisfaction. It is the driving force of poor decisions, lost identity, horrible anxiety, crippling depression and a prideful heart. A lack of contentment in oneself is nothing more than a hyper-fixation on the face in the mirror, which longs to look like anything other than what the reflection reveals.
“I am not enough” says to God, “You created a mistake.” I’d be hard pressed to find a better example of a soul bloated with pride. How dare the clay proclaim to the Potter, “The work of Your hands is unfit, unlovely, and dissatisfactory”? This lack of confidence then gives the creation a sense of validation to seek approval in other people, places and things apart from God. Oh yes, dear friends- discontentment and insecurity are indeed interwoven.
“I want an Oompa Loompa daddy! I want it now!”
The attitude of our culture is high paced, fast track and no time to waste. Get in, get out, get going- on to the next thing. The days of Sunday afternoon drives and stopping to smell the roses have been shoved aside, bowing to the current “rat race” of life.
Microwaved meals
Amazon Prime for faster delivery needs
Fast food drive-thrus
Youtube shorts, Tick-Tock and Instagram Reels because who has time for anything longer
Scan and Go for faster check out
On demand pay day
We are being conditioned to be impatient. Don’t believe me? Tell me how you feel the next you have to wait in line for something longer than 2 mins. Restlessness starts to stir, you look at your phone every minute like you are watching a dooms day countdown timer and anxiety starts to creep over your mind. You have things to accomplish and do not have time for such nonsense as waiting. We want it, when we want it and we want it now!
Impatience is another form of discontentment. How many times have you found out something is going to take longer than expected, decide you cannot wait that long and ended up going a totally different route just to gratify your need faster? It happens all the time and the problem is only getting worse. Stomping our feet like toddlers when we don’t get what we want immediately is not becoming of the human race .
“The Lord is my Shepherd. I shall not want”
So how do we combat this growing cancer of discontentment within ourselves, fueled by the culture around us? There are no easy answers here, my friend. Dissatisfaction has been around since the Garden days. We discussed briefly the fall of mankind in my “Boundary Lines” post as it pertains to disbelief in the Word of God, but I believe there was also an underlying sense of wanting more bubbling below the surface of Eve’s skin.
Whether it was insecurity festering within her heart or the desire to have what others have, a lack of contentment could have played a role in her decision to disobey God’s command. Of course, we will never know what was going through her mind, but we are told what came out of the serpent’s mouth. “Your eyes will be opened and you will be like God.” (Genesis 3:5) The lying snake showing Eve what she was “lacking”. “You can have it all, just like God. Don’t you want more?”
Do not think for a moment that flashing the world’s wealth and seeing the “It’s A Wonderful Life” montage of others from your cell phone is some new thing. Satan tempted Jesus with these very things when Christ was fasting in the wilderness prior to the start of his ministry. “Again, the devil took Him up on an exceedingly high mountain and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory. And he said to hIm, “All these things I will give you…” (Matthew 4:8-9a)
There is something within the human nature that Satan knows is prone to lust after things they do not possess. A burning inside the soul that seeks more. I am quite certain this craving was designed to only be fulfilled in Christ Jesus. Remember in our “When Roots Run Deep- Part 2” series we discussed Jesus as the Living Water and all who drink of Him shall never be thirsty again? Our Savior is the only one who can satisfy the desires deep within our being. David is one such man who knew this truth all too well.
Kind David wrote many of the Psalms that express this idea of God being our greatest joy and ultimate satisfaction in life. Perhaps the most well know is the 23rd. The very first verse packs a punch for our discussion.
The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.
I shall not want. I will lack nothing. Every need and longing will be fulfilled in my good Shepherd. I shall not want!
But too often we do…
The desires of our flesh can overwhelm us more times than we like. How do we, like Paul, get to a place in our lives and faith walk where we can say, “for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.” (Philippians 4:11-12)
What is the secret Paul is referring to? The answer lies in a verse you probably know very well or at least heard before.
“I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)
Paul didn’t say contentment came easy, actually he proclaimed the opposite to be true. If it were simple, he would have declared how he, himself defeated his fleshly desires. Instead, recognizing the intense struggle to constantly want the next, shiny thing, Paul advises the readers to turn to Jesus as the ultimate source of strength and victory.
So how can we apply this practically to our lives today?
Pray. Simple, I know- but there is nothing more powerful. Ask the Lord to protect your mind from desiring other things. Plead with Him to bring you to a place of satisfaction in Him alone. Allow Him to reveal areas in your life where you are weak and struggle in the realm of contentment.
Increase your time in the Word. Just like prayer, there is great power in the Word of the Lord. It changes mindsets and renews your vision, while bringing great peace and comfort. It will grow your relationship with Christ, which will help to bring you to a place of satisfaction.
Reduce your social media intake. Pull away from the daily barrage of the modern day “MTV Cribs”. This will not only aid in creating a spirit of contentment, but also reduce anxiety, depression and self-loathing.
Try to dig inward to determine where the drive to chase the treasures of this world stem from. Did you grow up with rather small financial means, so you try to overcompensate as an adult? Are you worried about what others will think, causing you to feel the need to impress? Get down to the heart of the issue so you are better equipped to defeat the problem.
Practice being still. Stillness is being completely satisfied with the current situation. Waiting says, "I don’t need anything right now, I can hold off.” When the desire to want the next thing causes you to rush ahead; stop, breathe and take a step back. Ask yourself why you feel the compulsion to seek instant gratification. Deny your flesh and slow down. Be patient.
Combat lies about yourself with the truth of God’s Word. I have mentioned this before in the “When Roots Run Deep-part 1” post, but let’s talk about it one more time. Self-hate is not humility. It is pride in costume. Search through the Word and find truths about what God says regarding His sons and daughters. Write them on sticky notes and post the verses where you can see them. This gives you the opportunity to read the scriptures multiple times a day, over and over. Wash your mind in the truth of those words and renew your thought patterns. Be at peace in knowing the God of universe does not make mistakes. Yes, you are imperfect- this is why you need a perfect Savior, but you are not useless or worthless and you certainly do not need to be anyone other than who He created you to be. In Christ Jesus, you are enough!
Living Beautifully Simple starts with contentment. True peace comes when we realize Jesus is the key to total satisfaction. If we gain nothing else from this world, but have Him- dear friends, we have everything.
